


This is technically a Newsies Group Chat AU (but with a slight twist)

by sarcastic_ace_artist



Category: Newsies - All Media Types, Newsies!: the Musical - Fierstein/Menken
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Attempt at Humor, Chatting & Messaging, Childhood Friends, F/F, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Group chat, Humor, Inappropriate Humor, John Mulaney References, M/M, Mutual Pining, Overprotective Brothers, Pining, almost all of the characters tagged are my ocs, except for Les and Sally because Les is a canon character and Sally was mentioned in the musical
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-01
Updated: 2020-02-02
Packaged: 2021-01-16 04:36:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 6,272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21265169
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sarcastic_ace_artist/pseuds/sarcastic_ace_artist
Summary: SchoolyardRoyalty added daisy, swords, MadHatter, pudding_and_pie, and marriagecounselor to a group chatSchoolyardRoyalty renamed the chat WHAT IS UP YOU FUCKING HOES~~~Canon? What's that?





	1. Sally wtf

**Author's Note:**

> Users:
> 
> SchoolyardRoyalty - Sally Miller  
daisy - Lucy Williams  
swords - Les Jacobs  
MadHatter - Hattie Phillips  
pudding_and_pie - Georgie  
marriagecounselor - James Allen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> SchoolyardRoyalty added daisy, swords, MadHatter, pudding_and_pie, and marriagecounselor to a group chat
> 
> SchoolyardRoyalty renamed the chat WHAT IS UP YOU FUCKING HOES
> 
> ~~~
> 
> Canon? What's that?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Users:
> 
> SchoolyardRoyalty - Sally Miller  
daisy - Lucy Williams  
swords - Les Jacobs  
MadHatter - Hattie Phillips  
pudding_and_pie - Georgie Walker  
marriagecounselor - James Allen

**New Chat**

**October 30th, 11:23 pm**

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _ added _ daisy_, _ swords_, _ MadHatter_, _ pudding_and_pie_, and _ marriagecounselor _ to a group chat

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _ renamed the chat **WHAT IS UP YOU FUCKING HOES**

_ marriagecounselor _ renamed the chat **sally please don't curse it's 11 at night**

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _ renamed the chat **fuck you james I do what I want. also you're an old man**

_ marriagecounselor _ renamed the chat **YOU WANNA FUCKING GO YOU CRUSTY BANANA?**

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _ renamed the chat **FUCK ME YOU OVERGROWN CHIN HAIR**

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _ renamed the chat **FITE! I MEANT FITE ME! I DONT WAMT TO FOCK JAMEA THAT SOUNDS DISGISTINF**

_ marriagecounselor _ renamed the chat **excuse you i am ace. also id rather die than see you naked**

_ daisy _: guys please. no fighting in the title.

_ swords _: listen to lucy

_ pudding_and_pie _: on the other hand this was fun to witness

_ MadHatter _: Sally.

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _: im soryeu jattoe plz dont do amyrhimg

_ MadHatter _: No hugs for you tomorrow.

_ daisies _: ooooOOOoooo

_ daisies _: capitalization & punctuation

_ pudding_and_pie _: you're in troubleeeeee

_ swords _: wait whats with the usernames

_ pudding_and_pie _: i get it!

_ pudding_and_pie _: les yours and lucys users go togetger! everyone @ school calls you daisy swords bc they ship you so thats why those are your users

_ daisy _: ship??? us???

_ marriagecounselor _: yeah its cuz you two are together

_ swords _: that would be cute and all

_ swords _: but 

_ swords _: we're not dating???

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _: 😲😲😲😲🤯🤯🤯🤯❗❓❗❓

_ MadHatter _: O_o

_ pudding_and_pie _: :0

_ marriagecounselor _: you

_ marriagecounselor _: aren't dating?

_ marriagecounselor _: ?

_ daisy _: i think we'd know if we WERE dating james

_ swords _: which we're not

_ MadHatter _: Sally whatever you're thinking don't do it

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _: babe they're not dating what the hell why aren't you two DATING?

_ daisy _: idk you should probably ask my brothers they’re the ones who vet any guys i “might date”

_ swords _: ^^^

_ MadHatter _: don’t call me babe my mom reads my text messages

_ daisy _: oh hey les betsy said you can come over after school today and that she’s taking morris and oscar out so they won’t bother us

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _: 😢😢😢

_ swords _: thats good

_ MadHatter _: no

_ marriagecounselor _: and you two are sure you're not dating?

_ swords _ removed _ marriagecounselor _ from the chat

_ pudding_and_pie _: well he does have a point I mean Lucy you're always hugging Les and shit it's not our fault we thought you were dating

_ daisy _ removed _ pudding_and_pie _ from the chat

_ MadHatter _: i hate to say it but they’re right you guys

_ swords _ removed _ MadHatter _ from the chat

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _ added _ MadHatter _ to the chat

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _: hey no my girlf stays here

_ MadHatter _: sally you know we’re not actually dating right? we’re still only thirteen

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _ removed _ MadHatter _ from the chat

* * *

**MadHatter to SchoolyardRoyalty**

**October 30th, 11:47 pm**

_ MadHatter _: hey it’s not my fault my mom says i’m banned from dating

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _ : 😒😒😒

* * *

**New Chat**

**October 30th, 11:54 pm**

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _ added _ MadHatter_, _ pudding_and_pie_, _ marriagecounselor _ to a group chat

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _ renamed the chat **Matchmakers**

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _: okay this is a real problem guys

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _: we need to get those two together

_ marriagecounselor _: this is the part where I usually try to tell you 'no' and then you start yelling at me

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _: excuse me I am a fucking delight

_ marriagecounselor _: but there's so much romantic tension between Les and Lucy that I can't take it anymore

_ MadHatter _: WE ARE THIRTEEN

_ MadHatter _: WE DONT NEED TO BE DATING ANYONE RIGHT NOW

_ pudding_and_pie _: idk it's like watching real life fanfiction

_ MadHatter _: Georgie you goddamn weeb

_ pudding_and_pie _: 🖕


	2. Please add me back

**dang dang diggity dang a dang**

**October 31st, 2:31 am**

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _ added _ MadHatter _ to the group chat

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _ added _ marriagecounselor _ to the group chat

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _ added _ pudding_and_pie _ to the group chat

_ daisy _: sally…

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _: yeehaw all y’all fuckheads where the hell are my memes at?

_ daisy _ removed _ SchoolyardRoyalty _ from the group chat  


* * *

**SchoolyardRoyalty to daisy**

**October 31st, 2:33 am**

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _: Lucy please add me back

_ daisy _: This is Betsy

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _: as in your older sister betsy? lucy come on stop playing with me

_ daisy _: Lucy is sleeping right now

_ daisy _: She says to tell you that you can "choke and die"

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _: lucy seriously stop fucking with me i know its you

_ daisy _sent an image

_ It’s a selfie of Betsy Williams staring unimpressed at the camera with Lucy sleeping in the background _

_ SchoolyardRoyalty _: oH SHIT SHIT FUCKING HELL IM SO SORRY MISS WILLIAMS IM JUST GONNA GO NOW BYE

* * *

**Eliiiza to daisy**

**October 31st, 2:35 am**

_ Eliiiza _: It’s done

_Eliiiza_: She won't bother you for a little while

_ daisy _: betsy you’re the best

_ Eliiiza _: Go to sleep

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Betsy's here!
> 
> Users:
> 
> SchoolyardRoyalty - Sally Miller  
daisy - Lucy Williams  
swords - Les Jacobs  
MadHatter - Hattie Phillips  
pudding_and_pie - Georgie Walker  
marriagecounselor - James Allen  
Eliiiza - Betsy Williams


	3. That kid is fucking dead

**SchoolyardRoyalty to MadHatter**

**November 1st, 12:14 pm**

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ holy shit hattie add me back to the big chat do i fucking have news for everybody

* * *

**CHRISTMAS MOTHERFUCKERS**

**November 1st, 12:15 pm**

_ MadHatter _ added  _ SchoolyardRoyalty _ to the chat

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ GUYS GUESS WHAT

_ daisy:  _ no

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ THIS GUY IN MY MATH CLASS ACCIDENTALLY CALLED MRS. WORTHINGTON-BYRNES ‘BABE’

_ pudding_and_pie:  _ lmaooooooo

_ pudding_and_pie: _ what happened afterwards? give us tge fucking tea sis

_ MadHatter: _ that kid is dead

_ SchoolyardRoyalty:  _ THEN HE FREAKED OUT AND STARTED APOLOGIZING

_ marriagecounselor: _ he’s so fucking dead

_ daisy: _ Who’s the kid

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ HE HAD TO LEAVE FOR A SPORTS THING RIGHT AFTERWARDS BUT EVERYBODY IN CLASS WAS FUCKING LOSING IT

_ swords:  _ what did worthington say

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ she was like “i dont know how to respond to that” and continued teaching

_ daisy: _ but who was it

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ Jay Hortenson

_ marriagecounselor:  _ doesnt he have a gf?

_ SchoolyardRoyalty:  _ exactly

_ MadHatter: _ didnt mrs. worthington-byrnes just get married to her fiance turned husband?

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ EXACTLY

_ daisy: _ I actually feel kinda sorry for Jay. And embarrassed

_ swords: _ I kind of agree with Lucy

_ marriagecounselor: _ holy shit

_ marriagecounselor: _ you are so fucking whipped

_ swords: _ I AM NOT

_ pudding_and_pie: _ yeah, you are

_ pudding_and_pie: _ it's kinda dumb how you don't realize

_ swords _ has left the chat

_ daisy:  _ hold on I'll go talk to him

_ daisy:  _ and Georgie

_ daisy:  _ try not to be such a jerk next time, okay?

* * *

**daisy to swords**

**November 1st, 12:31 pm**

_ daisy:  _ Les?

_ swords:  _ I'm sorry Lucy

_ swords: _ I didn't mean to snap at georgie

_ daisy:  _ I know

_ daisy:  _ it's okay

_ daisy: _ I'll talk with them

_ daisy:  _ Then I'll add you back

_ swords:  _ Tell them they can go fuck themselves

* * *

**CHRISTMAS MOTHERFUCKERS**

**November 1st, 12:40 pm**

_ MadHatter:  _ and that means you CANNOT just push them together you stupid fucks

_ MadHatter: _ if they say to stop

_ MadHatter: _ you need

_ MadHatter:  _ to fucking

_ MadHatter: _ STOP

_ daisy:  _ Les says "you can go fuck yourselves"

_ MadHatter:  _ oh hey lucy

_ daisy:  _ What happened here?

_ pudding_and_pie: _ lucy i’m sorry about pushing the dating thing

_ daisy:  _ I’m okay with it Georgie, but it’s Les you should say sorry to

_ daisy: _ And also I don’t think Les & I will end up dating

_ daisy: _ At all

_ MadHatter: _ okay even I’M rolling my eyes at that one

_ daisy  _ added  _ swords _ to the chat

_ swords: _ @pudding_and_pie I'm sorry for snapping at you

_ pudding_and_pie: _ no worried i’d be pissed too

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ anyways back to the kid who called mrs worthington-byrnes babe

_ MadHatter: _ is he still alive? is he still going to class?

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ well he’s still in class but doesn’t speak out as much now i think he embarrassed himself too much

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ it’s hilarious

_ daisy: _ I bet it is

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Users:
> 
> SchoolyardRoyalty - Sally Miller  
daisy - Lucy Williams  
swords - Les Jacobs  
MadHatter - Hattie Phillips  
pudding_and_pie - Georgie Walker  
marriagecounselor - James Allen
> 
> So a kid in my math class _did_ actually call the math teacher "babe" and he _did_ have a girlfriend. It was so funny that I decided to write a chapter based off of it.


	4. IN NEW YORKKKKKKK (JUST YOU WAAAIIIT)

**souTHERN MOTHERFUCKING DEMOCRATIC GAYS**

**November 2nd, 5:38 am**

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ AFTER THE WAR I WENT BACK TO NEW YORK

_ swords: _ A-AFTER THE WAR I WENT BACK TO NEW YORK

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ I FINISHED UP MY STUDIES AND I PRACTICED LAW

_ swords: _ I PRACTICED LAW BURR WORKED NEXT DOOR

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ EVEN THOUGH WE STARTED AT THE VERY SAME TIME

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ ALEXANDER HAMILTON BEGAN TO CLIMB

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ HOW TO ACCOUNT FOR HIS RISE TO THE TOP?

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ MAAAAN THE MAN IS 

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ NONSTOP

_ MadHatter: _ nonstop

_ pudding_and_pie: _ nOnStOp

_ marriagecounselor: _ Nonstop

_ swords: _gentlemen of the jury i'm curious bear with me are you aware that we’re making history this is the first murder trial of our brand new nation the liberty behind delibaertaion

_ swords: _ I intend to prove beyond a shadow of a doubt with my assitant counsel

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ cocounsel hamilton sit down

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ our client levi weeks is innnocent call your fist witnes

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ thats all u had to say

_ swords: _ okay,,,,,,

_ swords: _ PNE MORE TJING

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ Why do you assume you’re the smartest in the room?

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ Why do you assume you’re the smartest in the room?

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ Why do you assume you’re the smartest in the room?

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ Soon that attitude may

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ Be

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ Your 

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ DOOM

_ pudding_and_pie: _ (awwwwww)

_ pudding_and_pie: _ Why do you write like you’re running out of time?

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ Write day and night like you’re running out of time?

_ pudding_and_pie: _ Every day you fight, like you’re running out of time

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ keep on fightihg in the meantime

_ pudding_and_pie: _ (NON-STOP!)

_ swords: _corruption’s such an old song that we can sing along in harmony and nowhere is it stronger than in albany this colony’s economy’s increasingly stalling and honestly, that’s why public service seems to be calling me

_ pudding_and_pie: _ (He's just non-stop!)

_ swords: _I practiced the law

_ swords: _I practically perfected it

_ swords: _I’ve seen injustice in the world and I’ve corrected it

_ swords: _now for a strong central democracy if not then I’ll be socrates throwing verbal rocks at these mediocrities

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ HAMILTON @ THE CONSTITUTIOANL CONVENTION

_ swords: _I wAs ChOsEn FoR tHe CoNsTiTuTiOnAl CoNvEnTiOn!!! ✨✨✨✨

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ there as a NY junior delgate

_ swords: _ now what I'm gonna say may sound indelocate

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ goes and proposes his own form of govt

_pudding_and_pie:_ wHAt

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ 😰😰😰😰 HIS OWN PLAJ FOR A MEW FORM PF GOVT

_ pudding_and_pie: _ W H A T ? ! ? ! ? !

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ talks for SIX (6) hours the convention is listesssaadsf

_marriagecounselor:_ bright young man!

_ pudding_and_pie: _ YO WHO THE F IS THIS?! 🤨😠

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ y do u always say what u believe?

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ y do u always say what u believe?

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ every proclamation guarantees free ammunition for ur enemies

_ pudding_and_pie: _ (awwwwwww)

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ y do u write like its

_ pudding_and_pie: _ going out of style

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ write day & night like its

_ pudding_and_pie: _ going out of style

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ every day you fight like it’s

_ pudding_and_pie: _ Going out of style

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ do what you do

_ pudding_and_pie: _ *KNOCK KNOCK KNOWCK*

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ alexander?

_ swords: _ aaronb urr sir

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ its the middle of the night

_ swords: _ can we confer sir?

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ is this a legal matter

_ swords: _ yes & its important 2 me

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ 😒 wat do u need?

_ swords: _ burr ur a better lawyer than me

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ 😶😶😶

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ okay?

_ swords: _ I know I talk too much I'm abrasive ur incredible in court. succinct, persuasive. my client needs a strong defense you're the solution

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ Who's your client?

_ swords: _ the new U.S. constitution? 😁😁😁

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ nO

_ swords: _ hear me out

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ NO WAY

_ swords: _ a series of essays anonymously published

_ swords: _ defending the document to the public

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _no one will read it

_ swords: _ i disagree

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ and if it fails

_ swords: _ burr thats why we need it

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ the consitutions a mess

_ swords: _ so it needs amendments

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ its full of contradictions

_ swords: _ so is independence

_ swords: _ WE HAVE TO START SOMEHWERE

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ NO. NO WAY

_ swords: _ youre making a mistake

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ GOOD NIGHT

_ swords: _ HEY

_ swords: _ WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR

_ swords: _ WHAT DO YOU STALL FOR

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ what?

_ swords: _ WE WON THE WAR WHAT WAS IT ALL FOR

_ swords: _ DO YOU SUPPORT THIS CONSTITUTION?

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ of course

_ swords: _ THEN DEFEND IT

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ and what if ur backing the wrong horse?

_ swords: _ Burr

_ swords: _ we studied and we fought and we killed for the notion of a nation we now get to build

_ swords: _ for ONCE in your life take a stand with pride

_ swords: _ I DONT UNDERSTAND HOW YOU STAND TO THE SIDE

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ I'll keep all my plans close to my chest

_ pudding_and_pie: _ wait for it wait for it wait…

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ I'll wait here and see which way tje wind will blow

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ IM TAKING MY TIME WATCHING THE AFTERBIRTJ OF A NATION WATCHING THE TENSJON GROW

_ MadHatter: _ I am sailing off to London, I am accompanied by someone who always pays

_ MadHatter: _ I have found a wealthy husband who will keep me in comfort for all my days

_ MadHatter: _ He is not a lot of fun, but there's no one who can match you for turn of phrase

_ MadHatter: _ My Alexander… 

_ swords: _ Angelica…

_ MadHatter: _ Don't forget to wriiiiiiite

_ daisy: _Look at where you are

_ daisy: _ Look at where you started

_ daisy: _ The fact that you're alive is a miracle

_ daisy: _ Just stay alive that would be enough

_ daisy: _ And if your wiiife

_ daisy: _ Could share a fraction of your time

_ daisy: _ If I could grant you peace of mind

_ daisy: _ Would that be enough?

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ Alexander joins forces with James Madison and John Jay to write a series of essays defending the new United States Constitution, entitled The Federalist Papers

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ the plan was to write a total of twenty-five essays, the work divided evenly among the three men

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ in the end, they wrote eighty-five essays, in the span of six months

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ John Jay got sick after writing five

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ James Madison wrote twenty-nine

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ Hamilton wrote

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ the other

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ FIFTY-ONE

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ How do you write like you're

_ pudding_and_pie: _ running out of time?

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ Write day and night like you're

_ MadHatter: _ running out of time

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ every day you fight like you're

_ marriagecounselor: _ runNING OUT OF TIME

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _LIKE YOU'RE

_ daisy: _ RUNNING OUT OF TIME

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ ARE YOU RUNNING OUT OF TIME?

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ how do you write like

_ MadHatter: _ TOMORROW WON’T ARRIVE?

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ how do you write like

_ MadHatter: _ YOU NEED IT TO SURVIVE?

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ how do you write every second you’re alive?

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ every seCOND YOU’RE ALIVE?

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ EVERY SECOND YOU’RE ALIIIIIIVE?

_ marriagecounselor: _ They are asking me to lead

_ marriagecounselor: _ I am doing the best I can

_ marriagecounselor: _ To get the people that I need

_ marriagecounselor: _ I'm asking you to be my right hand man

_ swords: _ treasury or state

_ marriagecounselor: _ I know it's a lot to ask

_ swords: _ treasury or state

_ marriagecounselor: _ to leave behind the world you know

_ swords: _ sir do u want me to run the treasury or state department??? 😒😒😒

_ marriagecounselor: _ …

_ marriagecounselor: _ treasury? 😓

_ swords: _ Let's go

_ pudding_and_pie: _ BUM BUM BUM

_ daisy: _ Alexander…

_ swords: _ I have to leave

_ daisy: _ Alexander.

_ swords: _ Look around, look around at how lucky we are to be alive right now

_ daisy: _ Helpless!

_ swords: _ They are asking me to lead

_ daisy: _ Look around, isn't this enough?

_ MadHatter: _ He will never be satisfied

_ daisy: _ What would be enough?

_ MadHatter: _ He will never be satisfied

_ daisy: _ To be satisfied?

_ MadHatter: _Satisfied

_ daisy: _Satisfied

_ marriagecounselor: _ history has its eyes on you...

_ daisy: _Look around, look around!

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ why do you assume you're the smartest in the room?

_ daisy: _ Isn’t this enough?

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ why do you assume you're the smartest in the room?

_ pudding_and_pie: _ (NON-STOP!)

_ daisy: _ What would be enough?

_ MadHatter: _ He will never be satisfied

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ why do you assume you're the smartest in the room?

_ pudding_and_pie: _ (NON-STOP!)

_ MadHatter: _ Satisfied

_ MadHatter: _ Satisfied

_ marriagecounselor: _ history has its eyes on you…

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ soon that attitude's gonna be your doom

_ pudding_and_pie: _ (NON-STOP!)

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ why do you fight like you're running out of time?

_ pudding_and_pie: _ (NON-STOP!)

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ Why do you fight like

_ MadHatter: _ History

_ daisy: _ has

_ marriagecounselor: _ its

_ pudding_and_pie: _ eyes

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ On youuuuuuuuu?

_ swords: _I am not throwing away my shot!

_ pudding_and_pie: _ (Just you wait!)

_ swords: _I am not throwing away my shot!

_ pudding_and_pie: _ (Just you wait!)

_ swords: _ I am Alexander Hamilton!

_ pudding_and_pie: _ Hamilton!

_ MadHatter: _ Just you wait!

_ swords: _I am not throwing away my shot!

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ WHOO!

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ I CANT FUKCIN BLEIEVE WE SCPRED TICKETS TO SEE HAMILTON ON FUCKING BROADYWAY

_ MadHatter: _ I’m not even mad that you texted us this early in the morning

_ marriagecounselor: _ Pack your bags guys this is the best thing to happen to us ever

_ daisy: _ I’m so excited

_ pudding_and_pie: _ Holy shiiiiiit this is awesome

_ swords: _ This is gonna be so much fun!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Users:
> 
> SchoolyardRoyalty - Sally Miller  
daisy - Lucy Williams  
swords - Les Jacobs  
MadHatter - Hattie Phillips  
pudding_and_pie - Georgie Walker  
marriagecounselor - James Allen  
~~~  
So...guess who scored tickets to see the Hamilton Tour?


	5. Bonus 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Users:
> 
> idontsmokecigars - Race  
ThingOne - Mike  
ThingTwo - Ike  
Goingdeluxe - Albert  
SweatyBi - Jack  
Mom_Friend - Davey  
icantsee - Specs  
Pewpew - Sniper  
SunshineOceanBreeze - Crutchie  
Blinkblink - Blink  
casanova - Romeo  
swords - Les  
distinguished_bi - Katherine

**a group of dicks (+ the girls who put up with us & a literal child)**

**November 9th, 12:30 pm**

_ casanova: _HOLY SHITTTTTT

_ casanova: _GUYS

_ casanova: _I

_ casanova: _MET

_ casanova: _A

_ casanova: _GIRL

_ idontsmokecigars: _holy shit ro what happened? did some girl finally look past your short stature?

_ casanova: _first of all fuck you

_ casanova: _second of all she's like around my height so ha in your face

_ SweatyBi: _ seriously tho we want details

_ Mom_Friend: _ Jack let Romeo speak

_ SweatyBi: _sorry babe

_ casanova: _i was just standing at a hallway interesection and then this BEAUTIFUL girl starts walking down the hallway in my direction 

_ casanova: _she says “hey” and then continues walking away and i SWEAR it happened in slo mo

_ distinguished_bi: _ got any pictures?

_ casanova: _do you even know me kath?

_ casanova _sent an image

_ It's a slightly blurry picture of a black-haired girl walking away from the camera, but she's looking left so half her face is shown _

_ casanova: _she’s so fucking pretty 😍😍😍

_ Mom_Friend: _she looks familiar but I can't remember where I saw her from

_ casanova: _yeah funny story I forgot to ask her for her name

_ casanova: _ she was too pretty that I was speechless

_ swords: _ oh hey that’s betsy

_ ThingOne: _you know her??

_ ThingTwo: _the fact that Les recognized a college girl before us is concerning

_swords: _nah she's my best friend's older sister I see her at their house a lot

_ Blinkblink: _ wait your best friend as in Lucy Williams?

_ swords: _ yeah betsy is the one who approves our hang outs but for some weird reason she keeps calling them dates

_ ThingOne: _ gee I wonder why… 😒😒😒

_ casanova: _anyways do you think I'd be able to ask her out

_ casanova: _will she think I have ulterior motives

_ casanova: _ well she's a 18 right now, so she's just a college freshman

_ idontsmokecigars: _ wow an older girl ro you really went all or nothing

_ casanova: _ stfu dickhead just because I'm one of the youngest newcomers to college doesn't mean jackshit I can be a mature guy

_ casanova: _ plus there's only like a year or less between us

_ casanova: _ SO

_ casanova: _ Les!

_ casanova: _ you're my inside man please give me some information

_ swords: _ well I mean you asking her out is fine

_ swords: _ she probably won't take it the wrong way

_ casanova: _ yes! 

_ casanova: _ I'm definitely gonna ask her out now

_ casanova: _ I’m gonna do it i have a plan this is gonna be fucking AMAZING

_ swords: _ but it's actually her older brothers that you gotta watch out for

_ casanova: _ she has older brothers?

_ Pewpew: _ there's always some kind of catch isnt there

_ icantsee: _ her brothers could be anyone it's not like we actually know them

_ icantsee: _ how many brothers does she have

_ swords: _ two

_ SunshineOceanBreeze: _ I mean we could know them but it's probably a really really really small chance

_ swords: _ well then you guys are that really really really small chance

_ Goingdeluxe: _ so what you're saying is Romeo is somewhat fucked

_ swords: _essentially yes

_ swords: _ and considering that all of you actually know them and they know you back and kinda dislike you a little then this whole thing with asking Betsy out is gonna be difficult

_ Mom_Friend: _Les you're scaring me what's going on

_ ThingTwo: _ yeah tiny what's going on tell us

_swords: _ well…

_ casanova: _ i can take em

_ casnova: _ tell me who her brothers are and i’ll fight them for the right to take her out on a date

_ swords: _ her brothers are Oscar & Morris Delancey

_ casnova: _ whatthe fUCk

_ ThingTwo: _ 😲

_ Pewpew: _ O_o

_ SunshineOceanBreeze: _O.O

_ casanova: _ you mean the delanceys as in Morris who's two years ahead of us in college and Oscar who's a freshman too?

_ swords: _ yep

_ SweatyBi: _wait wait wait

_ Goingdeluxe: _so what you're saying is

_ Blinkblink: _ that out of all the girls in the entire fucking state of new york

_ ThingOne: _ Romeo manages to choose one of the only two girls

_ icantsee: _ who is the Delanceys immediate family

_ Pewpew: _ which means she's basically off limits

_ ThingTwo: _ to EVERYONE

_ swords _: lmao yeah

_ casnova: _holy shit I'm fucking fucked

_ casanova: _ I’m a dead man shit shit shit shit shit oh god what if they find out?

_ Mom_Friend: _ hold on a fucking second

_ SweatyBi: _ oooOOOoooo

_ SweatyBi: _ Davey cursed

_ Mom_Friend: _ so everytime you said you were going over to Lucy's place you were actually going to the Delanceys' house?!

_ swords: _ …

_ swords: _mayyyyyybe?

_ Mom_Friend: _ LES WJAT TGE FUCK

_ swords: _ they said they liked me the best lmao

_ swords: _ i am SO telling lucy about this

_ casanova: _ WAIT SHIT LES NO DONT TELL HER WHAT IF SHE TELLS MORRIS AND OSCAR AND BETSY DONT FUCKING DO IT

_ swords: _lol byeeeeee

_ casanova: _ LES GET THE FUCK BACK HERE NO YOU HAVE TO HELP ME

* * *

**swords to daisy**

**November 9h, 12:58 pm**

_ swords: _ hey Lucy I'm coming over

_ daisy: _ ?

_ daisy: _ Is everything okay? 

_ swords: _ lmao yeah

_ swords: _ I'm just hiding from my brother and our friends bc I told them who ur brothers were

_ daisy: _ Ok okay

_ daisy: _ I'll put on a movie

_ swords: _ you're the best Lucy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> People startsd shipping Betsy and Romeo on my blog and I decided to wrote a chapter based off of it, except they're in college and not highschool.
> 
> Do you guys want more bonus chapters like this?
> 
> EDIT: I changed their ages to make it compliant to my blog


	6. The first brother

**Chunqua**

**November 9th, 7:48 am**

_ daisy: _What the hell is this?

_ MadHatter: _lucy?

_ daisy: _ Oh it's the group chat she's always on

_ daisy: _ I'm Lucy's older brother

_ pudding_and_pie: _ but she has two older brothers

_ daisy: _ The older one

_ swords: _oh hey Morris

_ daisy: _Oh hi Les

_ daisy: _ Tell me you and Lucy are just hanging out and not doing anything else

_ swords: _ okay you were fine with us hanging out by ourselves when we hung out in elementary but now you're always checking up on us

_ swords: _what happened between then and now?

_ daisy: _ well for starters you have a crush on her now whereas back then the coolest thing you two did was when you two managed to climb a tree and then get stuck in it and then cry for me or davey to get you down

_ swords: _ I have a what on Lucy now

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ ❗❗❗❗❗

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ HE KNOWS TOO

_ swords: _ I do NOT have a crush

_ daisy: _ well you sesfgguydeyhb

_ daisy: _ Hi

_ daisy: _ Sorry about him

_ daisy: _ My brother’s an idiot

_MadHatter:_ did you just steal the phone back from him?

_daisy:_ We're driving and school hasn't even started yet

_daisy:_ Plus it's a minimum day we get out at 1240

_daisy:_ We can afford to bend the rules a little

_ daisy: _Anyways did anything interesting happen?

_MadHatter:_ nothing of interest to you

_MadHatter:_ are your brothers always like this?

_daisy:_ I only got lost in Brooklyn once

_daisy:_ And I was with Les the whole time

_daisy:_ Besides this nice boy watched over us while we were there

* * *

**Chunqua**

**November 9th, 1:05 pm**

swords: lmao @everyone guess what

_ swords: _ Romeo wants to ask Betsy out

_ daisy: _ HE WANTS TO FOXKING WJAY

_ swords: _ Lucy did you just curse

_ Swords: _ didn’t you just head to your room to get something?

_ daisy: _ DOES JE NOT KNOW TIAYS MY LIRRKE SOSYWR

_swords:_ wait

_swords:_ shit

_swords:_ Morris is that you?

_ swords: _ actually that makes sense she went to ask you something before heading to her room she probably asked you to hold her phone for a bit

_ daisy: _ ROMEO WANTS TO ASK BETSY OUT?!

_ swords: _ rip lmao

_ swords: _ byeeeeee

_ daisy: _ LES GET BACK HERE WHAT DO YOY MEAN ROMEO WANTS TO ASL NEYSI OUT

* * *

**Chunqua**

**November 9th, 1:48 pm**

_ daisy: _ Romeo wants to ask my sister out?

_ daisy: _ lol

_ MadHatter: _ from your brother's reaction to the idea itself I'm pretty sure Romeo's gonna die

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Romeo  
~~~  
Users:
> 
> SchoolyardRoyalty - Sally Miller  
daisy - Lucy Williams  
swords - Les Jacobs  
MadHatter - Hattie Phillips  
pudding_and_pie - Georgie Walker  
marriagecounselor - James Allen  
Eliiiza - Betsy Williams


	7. The second brother

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Users: 
> 
> SchoolyardRoyalty - Sally Miller  
daisy - Lucy Williams  
swords - Les Jacobs  
MadHatter - Hattie Phillips  
pudding_and_pie - Georgie Walker  
marriagecounselor - James Allen
> 
> m_delancey - Morris  
o_delancey - Oscar  
Eliiiza - Betsy Williams
> 
> idontsmokecigars - Race  
ThingOne - Mike  
ThingTwo - Ike  
Goingdeluxe - Albert  
SweatyBi - Jack  
Mom_Friend - Davey  
icantsee - Specs  
Pewpew - Sniper  
SunshineOceanBreeze - Crutchie  
Blinkblink - Blink  
casanova - Romeo  
distinguished_bi - Katherine  
BoundToRain - Elmer  
needleandthread - Buttons  
Shortstack - Smalls  
IThoughtYouWereAmerican - Sarah  
TLDR - JoJo  
AngereyGoose - Tommy Boy  
human_disaster - Henry  
SomewhatSane - Kenny  
cawcawmotherfucker - Finch  
CrunchyBanana - Mush  
NotExtra - Spot Conlon

**CHRISTMAS YO MOMM**

**November 9th, 1:20 pm**

_ daisy:  _ WHO THE HELL WANTED TO ASK BETSY OUT

_ MadHatter: _ …

_ MadHatter: _ Lucy?

_ MadHatter: _ is that you?

_ daisy: _ @swords you brat tell me if what my brother said was true

_ pudding_and_pie: _ so it’s not lucy

_ swords: _ hi oscar! 😀😀😀

_ daisy: _ les i love you like my future brother in law but don’t play this fucking game with me

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ HE FUCKING GETS IT TOO

_ marriagecounselor: _ jesus fuck even her brothers see everything

_ pudding_and_pie: _ dear god how oblivious can those two be

_ swords: _ please get off lucy’s phone

_ daisy: _ …

_ daisy _ added  _ m_delancey _ to the chat

_ daisy _ added  _ o_delancey _ to the chat

_ MadHatter: _ WHAT PART OF "THIS IS A KIDS ONLY CHAT" DO YOU WEIRDOS NOT GET?

_ daisy: _ well they just gave me my phone back I couldn’t do anything to stop them

_ m_delancey: _ Les add us to the big group chat

_ o_delancey: _ or we’ll ban yours and lucy’s dates

_ daisy: _ WE’RE NOT DATING

_ m_delancey: _ fine whatever

_ m_delancey: _ we’ll ban your hangouts

_ daisy: _ I’m gonna tell betsy

_m_delancey:_ lucy we love you

_m_delancey: _but oscar and i are gonna take that risk

* * *

**Romeo is fucked**

**November 9th, 1:23 pm**

_ swords: _ @casanova I may have made a SLIGHT mistake

_ casanova: _ a mistake?

_ swords: _ ehehehehehe…

_ casanova: _ les

_ casanova: _ what did you do?

_ casanova: _ Les what the fuck happened?

_ swords: _ uh…

_ swords _ added  _ m_delancey _ and  _ o_delancey _ to the chat

_ SweatyBi: _ 👀👀👀

_ m_delancey: _ YPU WANTEF TO ASK MY FUCKING SOSYER OUT?

_ casanova: _ oh. shit.

_ casanova: _ Les what the absolute fUCK

_ swords: _ okay in my defense I was texting my friends and Morris happened to be holding Lucy's phone

_ o_delancey: _ let's go back to the important ossue of Romeo here wanting to aSK OUR SISTER OUT

_ Mom_Friend: _ we didn't even know you had a sister, much less two

_ NotExtra: _ are you actually family? i've only bumped into her once in brooklyn and she seems nicer than the both of you combined times 10

_ o_delancey: _ look here you fucking paperclip

_ NotExtra: _ okay that was uncalled for-

_ o_delancey: _ WE ARE FAMILY

_o_delancey:_ wait what do you mean you ran into her in brooklyn?

_ casanova: _ does

_ casanova: _ this mean I can date Betsy?

_ m_delancey: _ NO

_ o_delancey: _ ABSOLUTELY NOT

_ m_delancey: _ YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED NEAR HER

_ swords: _ 👀👀👀

* * *

**swords to Eliiiza**

**November 9th, 1:26 pm**

_ swords: _ Betsyyyyyy

_ Eliiiza: _ What's wrong this time Les?

_ swords: _ morris ans oscar arw threatening boys to stay away from you again

_ Eliiiza: _ Oh my god not again

_ Eliiiza: _ Thanks for telling me

* * *

**Family Chat 💕💕💕**

**November 9th, 1:28**

_ Eliiiza: _ @m_delancey @o_delancey Stop threatening boys that get within 10 feet of me

_ Eliiiza: _ I am a black belt in taekwondo I can handle myself

_ Eliiiza: _ On that note stop threatening Les' older friend group

_ daisy: _ betsy please tell them to stop asking les what we do when we hang out

* * *

**Romeo is fucked**

**November 9th, 1:28 pm**

_ icantsee: _ how come you allow Les and Lucy to see each other then?

_ o_delancey: _ because we like Les more than we like most of you guys

_ BoundToRain: _ ouch

_ IThoughtYouWereAmerican: _ you're not doing anything to MY little sibling are you?

_ o_delancey: _ who tf are you?

_ Mom_Friend: _ that’s MY sister you soggy breadrolls

_ o_delancey _ : oh it’s the better looking jacobs twin

_ SweatyBi: _ DID YOU JUST CALL MY BOYFRIEND UNATTRACTIVE

_ m_delancey: _ if we tried Lucy would cry and then Betsy would be mad and then we would feel guilty

_ ThingOne: _ you guys can feel guikt?

_ o_delancey: _ jack your bf is as appealing to me as a lump of trash

_o_delancey: _no offense david

_ m_delancey: _ do you want to die?

_ SweatyBi: _ TAKE THAT BACK OR I’LL STRANGLE YOU WITH MY BARE HANDS

_ Mom_Friend: _ jack no it’s fine i’m not attractive to everybody you know

_ ThingOne: _ threat noted. plz let me live.

_ Goingdeluxe: _ hey wait no killing allowed here

_ m_delancey: _ well Betsy just sent us "a disappointed in you" speech over our family chat so unfortunately we have to let you live

_ o_delancey: _ how the fuck did she know what to say

_ Mom_Friend: _ hey no swearing in this chat Les is here

_ m_delancey: _ hold the fuck up

_ idontsmokecigars: _ (it's me. i'm the fuck up. please hold me.)

_ Goingdeluxe: _ (aww babe don't worry I'm coming ovwr rn)

_ m_delancey: _ @swords you told her what the fuck did you do?

_ idontsmokecigars: _ 😚😚😚😚😚

_ swords: _ lmao

_ o_delancey: _ Les what the actual hell

* * *

**Chunqua**

**November 9th, 1:37 pm**

_ daisy _ removed  _ m_delancey _ from the chat

_ daisy _ removed  _ o_delancey _ from the chat

_ daisy: _ hey Les how's it going in the big chat?

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ and hello to you too luce

_ daisy: _ hey sally, sorry i’ve just been worried about what my brothers are gonna do to romeo

_ marriagecounselor: _ i hope les sends us pictures of what’s happening

_ swords _ sent four images

_ It’s screenshots of the  _ ** _Romeo is fucked_ ** _ chat _

_ MadHatter: _ omg this is better than television

_ daisy: _ i’m gonna have to tell betsy to tell them to stop again…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I guess I'm going down the Romeo x Betsy path now...


	8. Last name dilemma

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Also known as the chapter in which I throw in a bunch of references to various musicals without any regard for plot/historical accuracy

**CHRISTMAS YO MOMM**

**November 9th, 7:32 pm**

_ MadHatter: _ hey @daisy

_ daisy: _ ???

_ MadHatter: _ why do you and your brothers have different last names?

_ daisy: _ oh we’re actually adopted

_ marriagecounselor: _ you’re not blood related?

_ swords: _ theyre not

_ marriagecounselor: _ but you look so alike

_ daisy: _ it's a little complicated

_ daisy: _ so basically what happened was that Betsy & I were put in the system because our dad left our mom and she became unresponsive and stuff. Betsy basically took care of the both of us during that time. Then service found out and took us from our home. I was 3, Betsy was 8. We met Morris & Oscar there. Oscar was 8 and Morris was 10. I remember when I was 5 someone wanted to adopt me so the boys told me to act like a bad child and I didn’t get adopted so we stayed together until this nice lady at the orphanage who basically raised us said Morris was old enough to take us all in & said she tampered with the documents to make it say that we were official siblings.

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ so who was this woman?

_ daisy: _ Oh her name was Matilda Honey

_ daisy: _ we still visit her sometimes

_ daisy: _ Did you know her mom runs a school?

_ pudding_and_pie: _ i think i know ms. matilda bc my mom works with her right now

_ pudding_and_pie:  _ for some reason tho werid things seem to happen around her

_ MadHatter: _ Like what?

_ pudding_and_pie: _ well there was this one time when there was a bully on the playground and he was standing under some pipes and i saw ms. matilda staring at the pipes and then the pipes burst and water fall all over the bully

_ pudding_and_pie: _ he started crying

_ MadHatter: _ well it's not as bad as Ms. Sawyer telling us about how her ex boyfriend had a plan to blow up their highschool in senior year after there was a suicide ring involving three other people and then her ex boyfriend ultimately killed himself with the bomb he was planning on using

_ swords: _ try harder. ms aragon told us about how her ex husband tried to send her to a nunnery after he tried filing for divorce

_ marriagecounselor: _ ms boleyn told us about how her ex husband tried to cut off her head with a sword because he was convinced she was cheating on him

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ okay but Ms. Seymour told us about how she almost died after giving birth to her son but her husband thought she died and she found out he was trying to date some girl who was like 13 at the time and she left him and took the girl in

_ daisy: _ I think that girl attends my sisters college

_ daisy:  _ Her name was Katherine Howard

_ pudding_and_pie: _ well there's this lady who works at the orphanage too and her husband divorced her because she didn't look like her profile picture

_ swords: _ I heard ms. seymour's ex husband tried chopping Howard's head off too

_ daisy: _ Okay but none of you met Mrs. Parr yet. She was married to this guy who had like 5 wives before her and then he died and she remarried the guy she loved. She's the English professor at my sister's college.

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ how tf does someone have like six wives

_ pudding_and_pie: _ but now they're ex wives

_ swords: _ divorced

_ marriagecounselor: _ "beheaded"

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ "died"

_ pudding_and_pie: _ divorced

_ MadHatter: _ "beheaded"

_ daisy: _ Survived

_ swords: _ do you guys think that the Parr teacher killed her husband?

* * *

**Hergaflergaherg**

**November 10th, 9:38 am**

_ NotExtra: _ hold on a fucking minute

_ Mom_Friend: _ language

_ SunshineOceanBreeze: _ english

_ NotExtra: _ @m_delancey @o_delancey

_ m_delancey: _ wtf its classtime

_ NotExtra: _ how tf are Betsy and Lucy your sisters if they have different last names?

_ o_delancey: _ news flash bitch, we're adopted

_ cawcawmotherfucker: _ Wait

_ cawcawmotherfucker: _ ur not twins?

_ o_delancey: _ No of course not

_ m_delancey: _ Oscar was born in June you dumbasses

_ o_delancey: _ and Betsy was born in October

_ casanova: _ jfc i feel like a baby now i was born the year after all of you

_ casanova: _ granted i was born in february but still

_ cawcawmotherfucker: _ lmao you were born in the year after ussss

_ Mom_Friend: _ Guys.

_ Mom_Friend: _ It’s class time.

_ SweatyBi: _ dave

_ SweatyBi: _ baby

_ SweatyBi: _ i’m sorry but no one actually cares

_ BoundToRain: _ I passed the chem exam! :DDD

_ SweatyBi: _ hey that means im gonna get score higher than 60!

_ o_delancey: _ that sounded really fucking sad

_ SweatyBi: _ okay you know what

_ SweatyBi _ changed  _ o_delancey _ to  _ thecurlyone _

_ thecurlyone: _ THE FUCK KELLY

_ SweatyBi: _ your hair

_ idontsmokecigars: _ IT FLOOF

_ m_delancey: _ lmao

_ thecurlyone: _ bastard

_ thecurlyone _ changed  _ m_delancey _ to  _ thetallone _

_ thetallone: _ oh fuck you oscar i am NOT that tall

_ casanova: _ yes you are

_ thecurlyone: _ you're still on thin fucking ice you undercooked cretin

_ casanova: _ well i know that betsy likes talking to me when we run into each other in the halls but go off I guess

_ thetallone: _ WHAT

_ casanova: _ shit

_ thecurlyone: _ YOU GO LOOKING FOR HER IN THE HALLS?

_ casanova: _ uh

_ casanova: _ oh look I have to take my clothes out of the oven now bye

_ casanova _ has left the chat

_ thecurlyone: _ you fucking bastard

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Users:
> 
> SchoolyardRoyalty - Sally Miller  
daisy - Lucy Williams  
swords - Les Jacobs  
MadHatter - Hattie Phillips  
pudding_and_pie - Georgie Walker  
marriagecounselor - James Allen
> 
> thetallone - Morris  
thecurlyone - Oscar  
Eliiiza - Betsy Williams
> 
> idontsmokecigars - Race  
ThingOne - Mike  
ThingTwo - Ike  
Goingdeluxe - Albert  
SweatyBi - Jack  
Mom_Friend - Davey  
icantsee - Specs  
Pewpew - Sniper  
SunshineOceanBreeze - Crutchie  
Blinkblink - Blink  
casanova - Romeo  
distinguished_bi - Katherine  
BoundToRain - Elmer  
needleandthread - Buttons  
Shortstack - Smalls  
IThoughtYouWereAmerican - Sarah  
TLDR - JoJo  
AngereyGoose - Tommy Boy  
human_disaster - Henry  
SomewhatSane - Kenny  
cawcawmotherfucker - Finch  
CrunchyBanana - Mush  
NotExtra - Spot Conlon


	9. The record

**CHRISTMAS YO MOMM**

**November 11th, 11:38 pm**

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ wow this chat has been inactive for like a whole day

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ that’s a fucking record

_ swords: _and you fucking shattered that record. you ruined the quiet streak how could you???

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ i exist to break hearts baby ;* XOXO

* * *

**daisy to SchoolyardRoyalty**

**November 11th, 11:40 pm**

_ daisy: _ HEY

_ daisy: _BACK OFF

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ lucy my dear sister in all but blood

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ i’m very fucking bi for hattie rn

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ don’t worry about me stealing your man

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ besides he sucks at math

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SchoolyardRoyalty - Sally Miller  
daisy - Lucy Williams  
swords - Les Jacobs  
MadHatter - Hattie Phillips  
pudding_and_pie - Georgie Walker  
Eliiiza - Betsy Williams  
marriagecounselor - James Allen


	10. Like an antelope

**Hergaflergaherg**

**November 12, 11:23 am**

_ icantsee _ added _ casanova _ to the chat

_ icantsee: _ @everyone guess what

_ casanova: _ NO SPECS WTF I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIENDS WE DATED ONCE DONT DO THIS TO ME

_ casanova: _ AND WHY DID YOU ADD ME BACK

_ thetallone: _ tf do you want now?

_ icantsee: _ yeah but then we broke up and you promised me i could do one thinf to you without repercussions

_ SweatyBi: _ guys-

_ casanova: _ SHIT SHIT SHIT SPECS NO

_ icantsee _ sent a video

* * *

_ Romeo walks through the hallways, talking to the cameraman, also known as Specs. “Okay, so, I’m gonna try and ask Betsy out.” _

_ The camera shakes and there’s the sound of muffled laughter. Romeo gets annoyed at the person filming this. _

_ “For real this time! I swear! Specs! Stop laughing!” _

_ Specs laughs for a few more moments. “Okay. Don’t freeze!” _

_ The camera pans to the side a little as Betsy turns a corner and comes into frame. She starts walking up to a currently oblivious Romeo. _

_ Romeo scowls and crosses his arms. “I _ never _ freeze!” _

_ “Hi Romeo,” Betsy says. _

_ Romeo freezes in horror, then turns to see Betsy. “B-Betsy! I-I…uh…” _

_ She gives him a smile. _

_ Romeo stammers for a few more moments before running off. _

_ Betsy turns to face Specs. “Is he okay?” _

_ Specs bursts out into laughter. _

_ The video cuts off. _

* * *

_ Goingdeluxe: _ Romeo be like:

_ Idontsmokecigars: _

_ TLDR: _ also Romeo:

_ AngereyGoose: _

_ icantsee: _ like an atollepe in headlights

_ casanova: _ SPECS WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME

_ thecurlyone: _ so i still don’t want you dating my sister but this is better than anything i’ve ever thought about happening while you chased after her

_ thetallone: _ wait how many times have you tried to ask her out

_ ThingOne: _ she probably thinks you’re weird now

_ casanova: _ fuck all of you

_ casanova: _ i hope all of you die a horrible death

_ casanova: _ every last one of you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thetallone - Morris  
thecurlyone - Oscar
> 
> idontsmokecigars - Race  
ThingOne - Mike  
ThingTwo - Ike  
Goingdeluxe - Albert  
SweatyBi - Jack  
Mom_Friend - Davey  
icantsee - Specs  
Pewpew - Sniper  
SunshineOceanBreeze - Crutchie  
Blinkblink - Blink  
casanova - Romeo  
distinguished_bi - Katherine  
BoundToRain - Elmer  
needleandthread - Buttons  
Shortstack - Smalls  
IThoughtYouWereAmerican - Sarah  
C- JoJo  
AngereyGoose - Tommy Boy  
human_disaster - Henry  
SomewhatSane - Kenny  
cawcawmotherfucker - Finch  
CrunchyBanana - Mush  
NotExtra - Spot Conlon


	11. You look like shit

**mom’s spaghett**

**December 10, 12:32 pm**

_ pudding_and_pie: _ i feel awful

_ pudding_and_pie: _ i look awful too

_ pudding_and_pie _ sent an image

_ marriagecounselor: _ you don't look awful. sally tell him

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ you look like fucking shit

_ MadHatter: _ Sally!

_ pudding_and_pie: _ 😘😘😘

_ pudding_and_pie: _ for real tho im sick

_ pudding_and_pie: _ throat scratcht and sore oh jesus fuck

_ daisy: _ georgie?

_ pudding_and_pie: _ lmao i threw up

_ pudding_and_pie: _ I can't fucking breathe yall

_ daisy: _ you’re lying down right?

_ pudding_and_pie: _ I REFUSE TO SUBMIT TO GRAVITY D:<

_ pudding_and_pie: _ I AM A REBELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLADLSFKK

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ georige?

_ pudding_and_pie: _ This is Georgie’s mother. He collapsed from exhaustion.

_ swords: _ lmao dumbass

_ daisy: _ les don’t be rude

_ marriagecounselor: _ maybe we should bring him some painkillers

_ daisy: _ i have some i snuck from my sister’s room but that never happened so don’t tell her

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _

_ swords: _ shut your fuck sally she just said it never happened

_ MadHatter: _ Are all of you really planning on sneaking into Georgie’s room?

_ swords: _ duh

_ daisy: _ pretty much

_ marriagecounselor: _ yeet

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ plz babe?

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _

_ _

_ MadHatter: _ …

_ MadHatter: _ Fine

_SchoolyardRoyalty:_ YASS BITCHESS  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SchoolyardRoyalty - Sally Miller  
daisy - Lucy Williams  
swords - Les Jacobs  
MadHatter - Hattie Phillips  
pudding_and_pie - Georgie Walker  
marriagecounselor - James Allen


	12. The Salt & Pepper Diner

**Shut your fuck up**

**January 7, 9:37 am**

_ swords: _ @everyone

_ swords: _ they added a jukebox in Jacobi’s

_swords:_ [[link]](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QnkrL42R7gk)?

_ swords: _ lucy is here with me we’re waiting on your responses

_ MadHatter: _ Fucking do it

_ marriagecounselor: _ holy fucking shit yes yes YESSSS

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ if you dont ur banned from the group

_ pudding_and_pie: _ we’ll be disappointed if you dont

_ daisy: _ he’s put in 7 already

_ pudding_and_pie: _ PUT ONE IT’S NOT UNUSUAL IN

_ swords: _ it is done

_ swords: _ me and lucy are ordering our usual

_ swords: _ she’s taking a video

_ swords: _ people are starting to freak tf out

_ swords: _ one guy threw a butterknife

_ swords: _ theyre rioting holy fuc

_ swords: _ this is awesome

_ swords: _ AND A SIGH OF RELIEF SWEPT THROUGH THE DINER

_ swords: _ dead silence.

_ swords: _ “GODDAMN IT”

_ swords: _ holy fuck a real life Karen™

_ swords: _ i want popcorn

_ swords: _ lucy is laughing so hard she can’t brathe

_ SchoolyardRoyalty: _ i hope lucy’s okay

_ swords: _ rude

_ swords: _ wow the songs still going

_swords:_ what the fuck

_swords: _what the holy fucking fuck

_ swords: _ they just

_ swords: _ they fucking unplugged the jukebox

_ swords: _ WHY

_ daisy: _ well at least we got entertainment out of it

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SchoolyardRoyalty - Sally Miller  
daisy - Lucy Williams  
swords - Les Jacobs  
MadHatter - Hattie Phillips  
pudding_and_pie - Georgie Walker  
marriagecounselor - James Allen


End file.
